Prayer... I need a lot of work on it. Really, I just need to learn everyday to make it a priority. Because I need to talk to God, and I need to sit at his feet and listen for his voice. It's great when I take the time, and really have communion with God. But most of the time I don't ever get to the secret place that Jesus describes in Matthew 6:5-8.
"Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people. I assure you: The've got their reward! But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you. When you pray, don't babble like the idolaters, since they imagine they'll be heard for their many words. Don't be like them, because your Father knows the things you need before you ask him."
It's shameful to say that sometimes when I pray, I'm just praying because I know it's what I'm supposed to do. I'm having a problem or someone else is hurting or I want something, and I've been taught since I was little to pray, so I pray. But a lot of times, I think the kind of praying I do is pretty close to the "babbling" and "standing in the synagogues and on the street corners" that Jesus talks about in Matthew. I just yearn for my prayers to be honest and true, and just plain pure time spent with God. I want my prayers to be about God and his glory, because that's when prayers will be answered. I want them to be full of faith.
Ephesians 6:18, "With every prayer and request, pray at all times in the spirit, and stay alert in this, with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints." Right before this verse, Paul is talking about the spiritual armor that we need to wear as followers of Christ. I am so tired of my prayers being about going down a list, or remembering that I meant to pray for this thing three days ago, and now I'm going to... a couple sentences. Prayer is talking to the God of the universe. It's about speaking up in the middle of a battle. That's what it is, and I often just treat it like a journal entry or something.
I know a few people, who are amazing prayerers. For them, their time in prayer is time spent in the middle of a battle zone. They are serious, they're for real. I want that. I want that everyday. Some examples?
1 Timothy 5:5 says, "The real widow, left all alone, has put her hope in God and continues night and day in her petitions and prayers." James 5:16-18 says, "...The intense prayer of the righteous is very powerful. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours; yet he prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the land. Then he prayed again, and the sky gave rain and the land produced its fruit."
Sometimes I feel so far from God, but it's probably because I don't have a ton of times of pure communion with Jesus. Jesus just says in Matthew to get alone, throw off your selfishness, and just come to him. He even says that you don't have to know what to say. I think that's why messes me up sometimes. I'm so frustrated or so upset about something, and I've ran over it and over it in my head, and talked to other people about it, and by the time that I decide to talk to God about it, I'm so confused I don't even know what to pray for. But Jesus says, "your father knows the things you need before you ask him." That's awesome. Because most of the time I don't know what I want, much less what I need.
I also wanted to share something from a book I've been reading. It has nothing to do with prayer... sorry haha! I've been reading, "Crazy Love". It's an amazing book; I highly recommend it. I wanted to share some of the stories that are shared in the next to last chapter. I hope this isn't illegal... :-/ These stories are pretty much just about people who had/have crazy love for Jesus and for other people. The cool thing about reading these after reading Crazy Love, is that you don't really think these people are that crazy anymore. It's more like "man, what am I doing in my life?"
Nathan Barlow:
A medical doctor who chose to utilize his skills in Ethiopia for more than sixty years, Nathan dedicated his life to helping people with mossy foot. Mossy foot is a debilitating condition primarily found in rural districts, on people who work in soil of volcanic origin. It causes swelling and ulcers in the feet and lower legs. The subsequent deformity, swelling, repeated ulcerations, and secondary infections make people with mossy foot social outcasts eqivalent to lepers.
I met Nathan shortly before he died. His daughter, Sharon Daly, attends my church and brought him to her home from Ethiopia when his health started to fail. After only a few weks, he couldn't handle being in the states. The people he loved were still in Ethiopia, so his daughter flew him back home so he could spend his last days there.
Once, Nathan got a toothache, the pain of which was so intense that he had to fly away from the mission field to get medical attention. Nathan told the dentist that he didn't ever want to leave the mission field for the sake of his teeth again, so he had the dentist pull out all of his teeth and give him false ones so he wouldn't slow God's work in Ethiopia.
Jamie Lang:
When Jamie was twenty-three years old she flew from the US to Tanzania with $2000 from her savings account. She planned to stay until she ran out of money, at which point she would come home. Jamie was overwhelmed by all of the need that she encounteed, so she started praying that God would allow her to make a radical difference in one person's life. After about six months she met an 8 year old girl at church who was carrying a baby on her back. Jamie learned that the baby's mother was dying from AIDS and that she was too weak to care for him. Jamie began to buy formula for the little boy, Junio, to provide him with the nutrtion he desperately needed. At the time, he was half the size of a healthy baby.
Jamie fell in love with baby Junio. She wondered if she was being foolish, a barely twenty-four year old, single, white American, entertaining thoughts of adopting a baby. Besides, she didn't even know if Tanzania allowed internatonal adoptions. Eventually, she discovered that the country didn't, but however, because she had lived there for over 6 months, she could establish residency.
Before Junio's mom died from AIDS, she came to jamie and said, "I have heard how you are taking care of my son, and I have never known such a love. I want to be saved."
Junio is now 5 years old, totally healthy, and HIV negative. Since adopting Junio, Jamie has gotten married, had a little girl, and is moving back to Tanzania with her family to work with Wycliffe to translate the Bible for a group that has never heard it before.
The Robynson Family:
This family of five, with 3 kids under the age of 10, chooses to celebrate the birth of Christ in a unique way. On Christmas mornings, instead of focusing on the presents under the tree, they make pancakes, brew an urn of coffee, and head downtown. Once there, they load the coffee and food into the back of a red wagaon. Then, with the eager help of their three-year-old, they pull the wagon around the mostly empty streets in search of homeless foks to offer a warm and filling breakfast on Christmas morning. All three of the Robynson kids look forward to this time of giving a little bit of tangible love to people who otherwise would have been cold and probably without breakfast. Can you think of a better way to start the holiday that celebrates the God who is love?
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